All I know for sure is that sex and love definitely make my world go ’round. For me, it is best when the sex and love come together in one pretty package. I envy people who say they can have sex as a sport of sorts. But I have never really been good at recreational sex. But I have heard good things about it and would not rule it out completely if I could figure out how it works. My problem is, if the sex is good, I fall in love, or tell myself I have fallen in love.
I have been in relationships where the sex died down to almost nothing. That always makes me feel disconnected. After too long without sex, I start feeling anxious and needy, but am unwilling to ask for sex. Granted, I will try and let her know without using the actual words. Some things I do to let her know I am “in the mood for love” is rub her shoulders, compliment her, and sit next to her on the sofa, wedging myself between all the dogs. If she is not in the mood when I am feeling needy for sex I get a massage, watch a sexy movie, read a sexy book or fantasize about a different woman I would like to have sex with. I never want to be the “needy one.” Pride is a stupid emotion. I get that.
I guess we are all needy, but nobody wants to admit it. How strange. Showing vulnerability is really hard for me. Sometimes, I can’t help it. It is obvious and there is no hiding it.
I know most people take matters into their own hands. WINK! But that bores me. For me, it’s about the contact with another woman that makes sex satisfying. That is probably why sex is more than sport to me.
I heard a good theory on sex that made sense to me. If your partner wants sex and you’re not physically ill, you should go for it, even if you’re not in the mood. I actually think that is a good way to go. That way couples never get to that awkward place where one person feels like they are always “asking” for sex. It doesn’t get awkward. No one ever feels undesirable from being rejected.
In my “humble opinion” there would be a lot less cheating if couples followed this basic sex rule. As the saying goes, we all get our needs met one way or the other. This is definitely something to think about. If you don’t have sex with your partner and she is a sexual person, then the problem will be solved one way or the other. Life has a way of solving problems with or without our input.
Carpe the sex!
