Over the years, I have met a few lesbians who remind me of the most obnoxious and spoiled sorority girls. Fortunately, these lesbians are a small minority in the lesbian culture. They are not hard to identify once you realize what to look for. They see the world as revolving around them. Can you say narcissist? Did you hear me yawn? Sorry.
But these women wear me out and bore me, unless I make the mistake of getting involved with one when caught off guard. Should you find yourself preoccupied or otherwise unaware, a lesbian princess can sneak up on you and charm you before you realize what’s happened. Color me embarrassed, as it has happened to me before. Now I try to steer clear of this type of temptation. On occasion, I can be that type myself, when I am feeling vulnerable and want to be pampered. I really appreciate anyone who will warm the car up for me in winter so I don’t freeze to death. So…you see I can be a bit of a princess myself on occasion, but mostly when it’s cold. But for me, the mood passes and I become “normal” again, or at least a different flavor of strange.
I love feminine lesbians. For that reason I have to be very cautious about getting involved with the Lesbian American Princess, as they are typically feminine, pretty girls. Although I would say I am not into roles, and personally resist the whole butch/femme thing on principle, I can’t help but like girly-girls. It’s in my hard-wiring, it seems. I love the way they flirt, their pretty clothes, nice perfume and sexy walk. When I’m smart, I often end up with a girl-next-door type or a brainiac, finally getting past the superficial stuff and falling in love with the beauty inside.
In the past I have gotten in trouble with a lesbian princess by not realizing at first that she was “that type.” Often she will approach you as the sweetest, most caring person you’d ever want to meet. Like a spider, she catches you in her web, eyelashes fluttering and giggles galore. Then when you’re completely caught up by her charm, the princess part of her persona starts peeping out gradually. One day in the near future, after you’ve fallen hard for her and she knows it, you find yourself carrying her uncomfortable heels and heavy purse around the park as requested, while she struts her stuff, empty-handed, sipping on water and wearing your flip-flops. It dawns on you about the time you step on your third sharp rock, barefoot and in pain, that you are a sucker. Hello! There’s your wake-up call.
Here are some clues she might be a lesbian princess. Proceed with caution or Not! We all like what we like.
She Might be a Lesbian American Princess If:
1. She expects you to nurture her constantly, but you rarely feel pampered by her.
2. You find yourself worn out by all her demands and start feeling the tug of resentment creep in.
3. She whines often and with enthusiasm.
4. She shows little interest in other people or anything that does not affect her directly.
5. She strongly dislikes other “lesbian princess” women.
6. She is hard to find when you really need her, when you’re sick, broke or otherwise feeling needy yourself.
7. She sets high standards for you and others, but does not hold herself to these same standards.
8. She is all style and no substance.
9. You have a hard time discussing anything significant with her like politics, books, art, or current affairs.
10. She interrupts you when you try to talk, changing the focus of the conversation to something she’s interested in.